A
while back,
I mentioned a truism learned during my retail days. It’s not the angry
customer who fumes, fusses, frets and otherwise makes a “I’m never
shopping here again” ruckus you have to worry about. They always come
back. They enjoy being the center of attention. No, it’s the customers
who without a word — to you — say “I’m not coming back” that should
concern you. Why? Unlike the noisemakers, they actually don’t come back.
Ever.
In a very similar fashion, when there is a conflict where it’s one
side or the other with no middle ground, and there is dissension in the
ranks over one or more leaders, it’s not the squawkers that should be
worried about. It’s the people who quietly say to themselves or perhaps a
close circle of associates, “I’m going to sit this one out.” Why?
Because come battle time, those who should ostensibly be loyal soldiers
fighting side by side are nowhere to be found. And far too often, those
who nominate themselves as leaders only to discover they stand alone
against the enemy are genuinely astonished at how this could be so.
One of the most heinous things a person can do to his or her cause is
place himself or herself in a situation where damaging, damning
evidence about their past that can and will be used by the opposition is
not confessed up front. While no one with any genuine grasp of reality
expects others to be a saint whose life is unspotted by sin, everyone
does expect people asking them to enlist in their cause to be honest and
open about who they are, including where they’ve been and what they’ve
done. If someone who by every bit of logic and reason available should
be a fellow warrior learns about leadership’s past transgressions from
the other side, not their own, there’s a problem. I remember Glenn
Kaiser, leader of the Christian hard rock group Resurrection Band,
saying during an altar call how we are all sinners, including himself.
He next said, “Here are my sins.” And he named them without hesitation:
ego, a weakness for porn and so on. He then said, “Those are my sins.
Which ones are yours?” That’s true leadership.
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